Relationships.

There's something about bonds between people that bothers me. Bonds can be broken just as soon as they are built. I don't understand this at all.. How can two people, so determined to stay friends 'til the end of time, let everything fall apart over the minor issue of different schools. Or how the unwritten rule between family members, about how they should always be there for each other and never back down in a time of need can be so easily broken. There are people out there that know how much I miss them, and I know that they miss me too. But it's almost as if there is no effort to make things better. On my part, nor theirs.

And that's when I begin to understand that it is apart of the natural cycle of life. People get close to some while others drift away, and this cycle repeats until there are those who are bound to stay. I think I've found some of these people, but it is still hard to see the others go.

But when these relationships fade with an immediate family member, it's really hard to take. There is nothing that should ever fade between family. They should always be there. Period. No excuses, no exceptions. There's nothing that irks me more than seeing someone so dear to me push them self away.. Further and further as I try to pull him back but his fat stubborn ass just keeps pulling himself away. I don't know what to do anymore. I've been struggling with this for the past year and I've run out of ideas. Everything just keeps repeating itself. I'll say something, get choked up about it, he'll freak out and then we'll get in a huge fight. Period. What do I do? Stand back and watch this happen? Ugh. I dunno. I need ideas.... But I have a feeling nothing will work.

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On a lighter note, school this week is going to be interesting, considering it's Catholic Schools Week, and we do a lot of stuff that involves the history of BSM and we don't really have to work too hard.

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Best of all, I really am in love. L-O-V-E. Love. Done.

Sterling has made things a lot easier. And I love how I can go to him with anything without being judged and without worrying about him wanting to run away from me screaming. It's all I can ever really ask for. Thank you. For everything..